I must have reread, rewrote, and broke down a half a dozen times. What would be the last email to a community of clients I built over the last 12 years, that started with…
As of April 6th, 2019 we will be closing our doors
Now that sentence alone took most of the time to write. How else was I suppose to word, sorry I failed not only my family and my clients but for myself…..
Or at least in that very moment, I felt like a failure.
For so long I was the guy who could figure it out. Question on Nutrition? Great, let me go get certified, test the theory on myself and teach you what the key points are. Confused about a workout program? No problem, I’ll put myself on three different programs in 12 weeks and let you know my thoughts and concerns. The company needs to make 10k this week in order to pay for unforeseen costs? No problem, I’ll come in early and stay late making sales calls until I close 12k.
But the tail finally caught up with the dog. And on April 4th, 2019 at 12pm I sent out the last email that ended with…
Thank you for trusting in me, and following me all these years,
wishing you all the best,
Besides asking my wife for her hand in marriage, that email was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do.
The beginning of the end
Now let’s backtrack nine months. Before a certain chain of events led to the email, I had the most amazing night of my life. I came home after a 14-hour shift at work to…
But from that high of highs, a chain of events occurred that would lead to me closing the doors to a 12-year-old company. One that I had bled, cried and fought for.
So what led to the close of the company
Like many, it was a chain of events that if set off would lead to the decision to close the company. For the safety of my family, my clients, and ultimately my sanity. Working 14 hour days I would say is common for a start-up and entrepreneurs. But my tolerance for stress was diminishing, and ultimately my oldest daughter whos turning eight this year asked.
“When’s dady coming home”
And for some reason this time when she said it, it pierced through all the layers of protection. Ultimately we all start a business to provide more for our children then our parents did for us. But what they didn’t tell you was most of us fall right back into the hamster wheel of overwork, underpaid, and our families ultimately footing the bill.
Now God works in mysterious ways. Don’t get me wrong I hit an all-time low. Some might equate it to depression, but I gave it all of a week to build myself up again. And at that moment as I was pressing send on the email, I had a sense of relief and calm. More then I’ve ever felt in the last 5 years of insomnia, anxiety and chronic stress.
And here’s the silver lining….
We welcomed our third child baby Ellie into this world, THAT NIGHT.
I thank God for Ellie joining our family that night because of the lack of sleep, changing diapers, and the pure JOY of a newborn was the greatest distraction I could have asked for. She has been a safe haven for me to heal, and recover. And now five months later I’m ready to be of service again.
Same, but different
You see I started a company to create more time for my family. But in truth, the model I created took time away, so this time around I’m working on a way to help more people while being in my daughter’s lives more than ever before.
I’ve learned through trials and tribulations that it’s not necessarily the HOW I need to figure out, but my WHY. And although my why, might look the same, the how has changed significantly.
Now I’m taking to the internet with my message, tools, systems, and support. Plus I’ve focused on a demographic that I resonate with, parents.
The service I will provide includes teaching tools and systems to help parents manage the biggest NOUN in their vocabulary. One that is overused, overexpressed, and for many, a word that has no end…
You see after 12 plus years helping people with their health and wellness, you find patterns. Lifestyle habits, and gaps that create opportunities for stress to creep in reek havoc. What I do best is bridge the gap. I teach systems, and coach people through new lifestyle habits to combat stress.
Stress isn’t the villain in this story, we need stress as humans to adapt and become more resilient. It’s the lack of tools and systems to manage the stress that’s the epidemic. We all know what stress can lead to depression, anxiety, obesity, heart disease, high blood pressure, heart attack, and the list goes on.
My symptoms with stress were both physical and phycological. I was chronically in a sympathetic “fight or flight” state all day running a business. I would come home, and run my family like one as well. My storytime with the girls at night felt like a sales pitch. My conversations with my wife were more of turn-taking then relationship building. To the point where we had regular “discussions” with the doors closed early into the morning. I was short with everyone including myself because I was burnt out
What I thought up to this point is what many parents think. All I need to do is exercise, eat better, and sleep more. I just need a little time to catch up and I’ll be ok…
But the truth is, given our season of life, we can’t spend the two hours at the gym anymore. We can’t just eat our kid’s leftovers for dinner. And time, well, that’s disappearing as you read this.
There had to be another way
Three years ago I was not sleeping, eating poorly, and working out too much. I was putting out fires at work, had two kids under the age of five, and my mental thermostat was fried. I was heading nowhere fast. So I immersed myself in the teachings of people who’ve dealt with stress head-on. They discovered secrets to not only light a candle at the end of the tunnel but make it burn so bright you need to wear shades.
Up until three years ago, I was doing the best I can with my clients. Helping them lose weight, get strong, and learn about nutrition. But I was neglecting the biggest pillar for true life long health and wellness, tools to deal with stress.
That brings me us to today
My one goal moving forward via the internet is to teach parents how to lose weight, create more energy, and manages stress. I know based on results, through coaching clients the last three months, my system works better than it ever has before. I’ve had people lose more weight, become happier parents, partners, and people by doing LESS than they have in the past
As parents, we don’t have time to add more….so I created a program to do less. It’s about doing the right thing for our season of life now and about being realistic about the goals. More energy, losing some weight, and a better relationship with my family sounds like good goals to me. So why are people living life, training at the gym, and eating like they are still in college? You need to sit down and be honest with where you are at in life. As a parent, we need to let go of the old goals and create new ones. We need to be creating a daily lifestyle that enables us to live long and healthy for our children.
So yeah, that’s where I’m at, and hopefully, you can learn from my journey thus far. And continue to learn through my story via this blog. Time to go plays with my kids…